Showing posts with label spiritual. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spiritual. Show all posts

Saturday, July 13, 2013

The Best Laid Plans

“The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry.” – Robert Burns

Do they ever.

That’s all I kept thinking about when I was in the our church membership class on Sunday. We’ve been attending a new church for about a year and a half, and recently we have gone through the membership process. Sunday was our last class, the one where shared our testimonies about how we each came to faith in Christ.

As I listened, what struck me was how some in the group found Christ – or found their way back to Chrisst – often on the heels of a poor decision. And I don’t mean little mistakes, but some really bad decisions – some committed in ignorance of God’s laws and standards and some committed with full knowledge of their willful sin.

But what I kept thinking was this: was it a poor decision if it ultimately led them to Jesus? Not trying to open a theological can of worms, I didn’t voice my question aloud, but I have been pondering it all week long.

And I began to contemplate that tenuous line between our free will and God’s sovereignty and plans. I admit that I have always struggled with this question. But the more I hear the stories of others, the more I have to conclude that God is still sovereign, even in the midst of us exercising our free will. I don’t fully understand the relationship between the two, but I am consistently confounded by the realization that our poor use of free will still does not thwart God’s plans for us – or maybe I should say,’does not have to’ thwart God’s plans for us.

Now I can already hear the protest: won’t that give license to people to make stupid choices because God will just clean up their messes? Well, sure, I guess people could pre-suppose that, but that is not what I am suggesting. What I’m thinking is that God’s plans for us were pre-ordained with foreknowledge of our free will, not without it. Knowing the choices we would make, God had a plan for us within those choices, to bring ultimate good from it, bringing glory to Himself in the process. That doesn’t mean that there wasn’t a ‘perfect’ will of God for someone, should someone have the ability to choose perfectly, every single time. But God, knowing that no human being was ever going to hit the bull’s eye 100% of the time, knew that and planned for it. I heard Beth Moore once say, “You can’t separate God’s sovereignty from His foreknowlege,” and I think that is a good way of trying to understand it.

I’m not saying that this is a blank check to just do whatever you want because that must be God’s plan and that everything that happens is what God wanted. And honestly, I don’t have an explanation as to how it works. But for the believer, the person who has placed his trust in Christ, this has to be the reality: somehow, even in our poor, sinful, and weak choices, God, in His foreknowledge of those choices, has a plan to use those choices for our good.

Now I do think we have a responsibility to repent of our poor choices and ask for God’s intervention. And I don’t think it automatically happens all the time for everyone. But I think the offer is there. I heard my former pastor explain it this way: God’s ability to redeem a Plan B is so comprehensive, so awe-inspiring, that it almost seems like Plan B was Plan A.

God is the master-revisionist; He is able to ‘re-write’ a bad choice and still create a positive ending, in line with the plans He has for us.

God is the master-GPS; He is able to take every wrong turn and re-calibrate our course so we still get to the planned destination.

God is the master-McGyver; He is able to take the dregs of any poor choice we make and create something that is custom-made for the plans He has for us.

This doesn’t mean that we won’t experience delays in the plot or messy resolutions to the conflict; it doesn’t mean that there won’t be consequences or unneeded drama. It doesn’t mean that our route was ideal – the shortest, the one without traffic, delays, accidents; maybe our choices caused us to take the long way around – with lots of wrong turns, wasted time, dull scenery, and endless miles to no-where. It doesn’t mean that we didn’t squander time, opportunities, and resources – and possibly damage others in the fall-out.

But it does mean that He can somehow right our wrongs. I can’t explain how He does it, but I can’t deny that He does.

I don’t want to go so far as to say that there is no bad choice, but I think I can safely say that there is no choice that has to be permanently bad; every choice is redeemable, if we are willing. That, I believe. And that bring a tremendous amount of comfort to this indecisive perfectionist who fears making decisions, both big and small, for this very reason.

While the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry, the plans of God do not. Ever.


Tuesday, January 1, 2013

{Insert Obligatory New Year's Post Here}


According to Macy's (and we all know they are the authority on all this), Santa's arrival at the end of the Thanksgiving Day Parade kicks off the Christmas season.  I don't know if they officially declare it the end of the season on New Year's Day, but that how I see it: the holidays are officially over on New Year's Day. (And please - they have to be; I cannot keep eating like this one.more.day. It literally feels like 40 Days of Gluttony. In every way.)

Obviously, we all know that NYD isn't just the end of the season; we all know it represents the start of a whole new something else (even though the only difference between one year to the next is just a span of few seconds).

For me, I do like to look back a little, before I look ahead. And it is actually kind of convenient for me: my birthday is December 31, so on  New Year's Eve, I not only get to finish off  the calendar year, but chalk off another birth year, too.

So I was doing a little thinking about 2012 as we were approaching the end of this year...trying to reflect on the good and the bad.  There were definitely good things about 2012, but as I looked back, I definitely felt like this was one of the harder years.  Not awful...just tougher.  Not to be depressing, but from my perspective, the first word I thought of was LOSS.  Very good friends lost their mom this year. An old youth group friend lost his wife. I lost my unborn baby. Hurricane Sandy. Newtown, Connecticut.  To name only a a few.

That's not to say that there weren't some bright spots and many ways I saw God's faithfulness. They definitely were there.  But the past year would definitely fall in the more 'challenging' category.  If I'm honest, I am not sad to see 2012 go.

So, looking ahead to 2013...

James and I talked about the new year a little over dinner last night. [And I even got him pause the Bowl Games today to look at the budget I came up.]  But I am actually one of those people who likes to resolutions. I made some last year, and while not perfect completion, I did make progress.  So being motivated by results...we started talking about...well, not maybe not resolutions, but some hopes and anticipations -and yes, probably some resolutions mixed in there - for the new year.  And here are a few I came up with:

*Church Involvement: About this time last year,we prayed and made a choice to seek a church closer to our home; it just got too hard to be involved with our church being 40 minutes away with the nightmare-ish 347 in our way, thwarting our every attempt.  We actually were very blessed to find a church fairly quickly...one that is literally 3 minutes away, right in our neighborhood, actually.  We spent the year getting to know this small, simple, sweet body of believers - and we think it's time to get involved.  And I'm excited about that.

*Health: Well, it's not a new resolution, just a continuation of last year's resolution. I made progress last year to get back to the gym, zumba, eating better...and I love how I feel when I'm taking care of myself. I managed to get off 75% of the weight I gained after being married, so I'm hoping to cross that one off the list, stat.

*Spiritual: I was telling James that I felt like I've spiritually plateaued a bit.  And I can say for sure, that in the past few months, Jesus has definitely been stirring my heart and drawing me close to Him again.  I had an amazing growth spurt in my relationship with Him some years ago - probably between 2005-2007.  But it's been a while since I've experienced Him like that.  I know I can't re-create that, but I can create opportunities and space in my life to spend quality time with Him.  And I love how I feel when I do that.

*Personal: I don't know how to put this one into words, but I'll try.  I want to be braver. Take more chances.  I know that sounds cliche, but I don't mean 'do more adventurous things.'

If this makes sense, I want to be less afraid to be myself. To be courageous enough to obey God in the moment and not stall. To step out and talk to someone...about God, about anything. To be more willing to offer myself to others. To not shy away from opportunities to get involved or be uncomfortable or put myself out there or feel awkward. To be less self-conscious and more conscious of others. To be bolder.  To be less afraid of the future. To worry less. To be at peace and trust God more. To be OK with not having to (well, not being able to) control every detail of my universe.

When I think of the person I want to be, I think of someone who is calm, serene, takes the challenges of life in stride with grace and courage and peace.  Someone who is willing and available to give of herself to others, without always measuring and calculating and controlling. I want to be more of that person this year.

Sure, there are more things I'd like to accomplish - financial clean-up, organizing my house, projects I've procrastinated on, being better professionally, investing in sharpening some rusty skills -  but those are things would like to do. I think I would like most of my energy to go toward letting God renovate the person I'm supposed to be.

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

I Had It All Wrong

My project for December was to focus on the Advent Season...not the Holiday Season (gross), not even the Christmas Season (too watered down).

So, my thought was to have some kind of daily exercise or activity where I'd contemplate... ponder... consider.... the coming of Jesus 2,000 years ago.  Or something spiritual like that.

But I had it all wrong.

The truth is this: it's not just that Jesus came, although that is incredibly significant.

It's that Jesus comes. Present tense. Right here. Today. Into my world. Into my living room, even.

And this is how it happened for me today:

James and I are going through the Moody monthly devotional we got from our church. No surprise, the month of December focuses on the coming of Christ.

I'm actually two days ahead of where we are together (well, I'm on schedule; we are a little behind), and this morning, I settled in with my cup of coffee and my fake fireplace to do my spiritual 'due diligence' to 'contemplate' these very deep and mysterious events of the Advent. Today's reading was about Elizabeth and the miraculous birth of her son, even though she was barren.

The last paragraph went like this:

Many women throughout the Bible struggled with infertility: Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, Hannah, and now Elizabeth. Each prayer was answered, but not always in an expected way.  Their stories also reveal something about the tender heart of God toward these women who longed to be mothers...Pray to the God who blessed Sarah, Hannah, and Elizabeth that He will continue to answer prayers in unexpected ways."

"The tender heart of God toward these women who longed to be mothers..."


And that is where Jesus came this morning.  Right in that devotion - with me, my coffee, and my fake fireplace - He came.

That might seem like just a nice encouragement on the power of prayer, the wonder of God's ways - and it is all that.

But I had a miscarriage last week.  My first pregnancy.  Seven days ago, I found out my baby had no heartbeat. I don't have the words (yet) to describe what I've experienced the past five weeks, but suddenly, these words took on a life of their own. I'm not kidding...I literally heard that phrase whispered in my heart: "The tender heart of God toward these women who longed to be mothers..." 


To hear that from God, while my heart is still healing...that His heart is tender toward women who long to be mothers....

Oh, man.

Jesus came. Right there with me in my living room. He was there.

And then it hit me: I had it all wrong.  It's great to contemplate the wonders of His coming so many years ago; in and of itself, the magnitude of that event is incomprehensible and nothing short of genuinely miraculous. But His coming is not past- tense. The wonder we miss is that He still is coming.

I thought my decision to focus on the Advent and His coming was my little gift or act of service to Him. But it's turning out that this actually is His gift to me...to remind me at a time when I really needed to know it - no, when I really need (present- tense) to experience it - the Advent isn't only about His Coming centuries ago. The Advent is about His Coming...today. Present- tense. At this very moment. Not just to a manger, but right here. In this very room, in fact.

It's not (just) that Jesus came.

He comes.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

And So It Begins...

ad·vent [n.]

1. a coming into place, view, or being; arrival: the advent of the holiday season.
2.( usually initial capital letter  ) the coming of Christ into the world.
3.( initial capital letter  ) the period beginning four Sundays before Christmas, observed in commemoration of the coming of Christ into the world.

Macy's says the official start of the season is when Santa arrives at the end of the Thanksgiving Day Parade. But for me, it's December 1st.

The "Christmas Season" or the "Holiday Season" is the official title. But honestly? Those terms are void of any significant meaning.  'Christmas' is so commercialized and marketed that it's more of a secular title than a sacred one; 'holiday' season is a completely neutered, almost insulting.  


But Advent: A coming into view. An arrival. It automatically begs the questions: "The coming into view of who? Of what? Whose arrival?"


I admit, I love all the fun, secularized aspects of this season too - the shopping, the parties, the goodies, the Christmas music, the movies, the decorating, the traditions, the Secret Santas...I love, love, love it all.  But "Advent" is not typically in the front of my mind as I tear through this month in a frenzy to Dec. 25. And that's sad.


Today's December 1st.  That gives me a full month to prepare my heart for Christ's Advent. My goal for this month is to do something every day that reminds me of the Advent Season.  It doesn't have to be huge, but just in some way, acknowledge that this season is about an arrival...the Son of God. A coming into view...of God Himself. In the flesh.


Really.  What is a bigger reason to celebrate than that? Black Friday? Seriously?


I came across a few good website with some ideas.  I'll pass them on to you, if you are looking for ways to celebrate the Advent Season. The arrival. The coming into view...of something...Someone...who changed everything.   

That is something worth contemplating for the next 25 days.